Top Ten: Sir Alex Ferguson quotes

08 February 2010

Manchester United notched up another five goals at Old Trafford this weekend and it’s starting to look ominously like the Red Devils are embarking upon yet another relentless second-half-of-the-season march towards the Premier League title.

As the season approaches what the Manchester United manager himself dubbed “squeaky bum time”, looks back at ten great quotes from undisputed master of Old Trafford Sir Alex Ferguson, including musings on Gary Neville, David Beckham, Paul Ince and “that famous night in Barcelona” …

1. “When an Italian says it's pasta I check under the sauce to make sure. They are innovators of the smokescreen.”

2. “Pippo Inzaghi was born in an offside position.”

3. “You’re a f***in’ bottler Incey! You cannae handle the stage, can you? You are a f***kin’ bottler!” (to Paul Ince at half-time in Barcelona, 1994)

4. “At the end of this game, the European Cup will be only six feet away from you and you’ll not even able to touch it if we lose. And for many of you that will be the closest you will ever get. Don’t you dare come back in here without giving your all.” (half-time team talk, 1999 Champions League final)

5. “I can’t believe it. I can’t believe it. Football. Bloody hell.” (after the 1999 Champions League final between United and Bayern Munich)

6. “Just f**king patch him up” (to the physio after kicking a football boot at David Beckham’s eye)

7. “On you go. I’m no f***ing talking to you. He’s a f***ing great player. Yous are f***ing idiots.” (to the media’s questions about Juan Sebastian Veron)

8. “I am such a bloody talented guy. I might go into painting or something like that.” (on his plans for retirement)

9. “What the f**k are you lot playing at? That is the biggest load of sh**e I’ve ever seen. Not one of you can look me in the eye, because not one of you deserves to have a say. I can’t believe you’ve come here and decided to toss it off like that crap you’re playing out there.” (Half-time at Sheffield Wednesday, 1998.)

10. “If he was an inch taller he’d be the best centre half in Britain. His father is 6ft 2in - I’d check the milkman.” (on Gary Neville)

Can you think of any other Ferguson words of wisdom? What do you think makes the Manchester United boss such a fiery character? Who will be the next in the Old Trafford dressing room to get the hair-dryer treatment?